Jeff's Bourbon Street Blog

Back to the Quarter: Red Dress Run 2007

2007-08-14T17:04:00.000-05:00

There's nothing better than the letters B and N with an arrow pointing right at the door containing not just the promised beer but also shade. That was the general consensus Saturday at the annual Red Dress Run in New Orleans. With a heat index exceeding 110, and few clouds to offer a break from the sun smart hashers needed to make good use of these stops for shade and that most important beverage: beer.

Trail started at Utopia, the club on Bourbon that boasts "the largest dance floor" according to some of their advertisement. The beer was flowing as some fourteen-hundred men and women all clad in various states of un red-dress arrived for the 1pm start time.

A little after 1 the hares were off, follwoing them a sea of red heading towards Canal St. and an unsuspecting sample of the tourist population in the city. At Canal the pack took a right, heading away from the lake, making their way to Dauphine and St. Ann, the location of the first beerstop of the run: Goodfriends.

The bartenders at Goodfriends, a sports bar past the lavender line for those playing the home game, were very excited to have their location swamped with hundreds in red dresses. So much that they got into the spirit and dressed up as well. a few also got a little carried away, exposing what they had or didn't have under their skirts, much to the appreciation of the harrierettes at the bar.

Leaving Goodfriends, the hashers made it back to Bourbon Street this time exiting the quarter and entering the Marigny. Ray's Boom Boom Room and two other bars would be the next stop of the day. The word of this stop was "sausage," (surprising that it wasn't the word of the last stop) as famished and thirsty hashers purchased and snacked on sausages. For those hashers that couldn't get their hands on the sausage, pizza was also supplied by the Hash to hold them over until after he run.
The next stop, Molly's at the Market proved to be another popular location, not just for me, as someone who always seems to end up there at some point while out drinking, but for the many hashers who quenched their thirst at this stop and found shade along Decatur.

Following the trail to the river the next stop under the pavilion in Waldenburg Park for Jell-O shots and a couple of songs. With this many people in red at one location, brave tourists would occasionally interact with the runners.

Heading out to Decatur, the pack took the obligatory run up and over Jax Brewery then crossing through and around Jackson Square before making way back to Bourbon St. Many hashers not able to control primitive urges found themselves on stage at Cat's Meow. An astonished M.C. Tracy coached them in the finer points of stage performance. The real beerstops, though, would be a couple of blocks ahead at Razoo's and and BBC where shotgirls stood ready with whipped cream for blowjobs (the shot) and beer.

The home stretch was upon us, the end at Bourbon Cowboy only blocks away. As the crew from Neutral Ground Films documented the faster hashers (and shortcutting bastards) were already drinking, riding the bull, or eating the hash provided BBQ. Everyone beat the heat, and that made it a good day.

Edit: As always the other hashers started posting their pictures. They're at the photo page of the NOH3.

It's about time someone took notice!

2007-08-02T19:23:00.000-05:00

This site has been rated

among the bottom 95%

of all Web sites by

Pointless Communications

Returning to Bourbon... Sort Of

2007-07-30T17:38:00.000-05:00

This year the New Orleans Hash House Harriers will start their annual Red Dress Run at Utopia, at 227 Bourbon St. The run is August 11th and registration starts at 10:00am and the run/pub crawl starts at 1:00pm. It's $40.00 at the door, includes beer and food, and some proceeds will go to City Park.

This will be my 4th RDR since I started hashing. Hopefully I can find something to wear before next Saturday.

Thanks, It's Been Fun

2007-02-25T19:16:00.000-06:00

BourboCam Live will be going on a little hiatus for a while. While I'm not sure if, when, or how it'll be back I gotta say it was fun while it lasted.

Since July 2004 I have seen a transvestite try to swallow the microphone, been bitten by a wife-swapping vampire, bitten by a frisky soon-to-be mother-in-law, met past and present silver, gold, and bronze guys, watched a woman swallow her pet snake, met Dave Andrews, been farked, ate life savers off a bachelorettes bust, drank after strangers, met Darius as he went west, read email from servicemen in Iraq and Afghanistan during Carnival, met some really great people: The Chicago Bomb Squad's The Legend and TJ, Bead Whore's Debbie and John, Sherie, Waya, Swiss Vampire, Mrs. Trbl, and many of the other MG Fourmites (whose names I will not be able to recall), Dakota from the Penis Police, Casey and Todd and their lovely spouses from My Dirty Sanchez, many of both the KOE and the Parrot Heads, all of the great BourboCam hosts: Cory, Reese, Sandy, Danika, Catscan, Brooke, Red Bean, Jon, Jennifer, Nola.com's TJ, Ray, Wolfgang (Dude, thanks for turning me onto this gig), and Emily, gave spankings, read email from our regulars like Bear, Eddie from Ohio, Liz, Mike, and Lori, received spankings, interviewed a girl while she was getting whipped by a man named "Pink," helped keep Cat's Meow from burning down, met all the great people at Cat's: Dave Punch, Mac, Andy, Missy, Tracy, Kim, Mikey, Brittany, Ali, Jason, and Julio, saw plenty of tits during carnival, saw plenty of tits other times of the year, got to flirt with cute girls, interviewed Jackie Clarkson, had my ass grabbed too many times to count, covered two parades on Paradecam, met a friendly officer and his horse, had my own harem, was drawn a picture of Lum live on the show, interviewed an iguana, kissed my fiancee at New Years on the Internet, and closed out Mardi Gras two years in a row.

Not bad for 15 minutes.

Thank you.

An interview with Joe.

2006-12-31T12:31:00.000-06:00

Meet Joe, the seven year-old iguana. And let me tell you he was popular with the ladies.
But Danika was not too impressed with Joe.

Tank Trek: 2006

2006-05-31T20:16:00.000-05:00

If you're living on or near the gulf coast your chances of having evacuated are pretty good as we've had some "above average" seasons. Evacuating large amounts of people is never easy and even with preparation, contraflow, and phased evacuation plans there's still going to be traffic.

The folks at the Morning Train Wreck, KKND's morning show, are doing their part to raise Hurricane evacuation awareness. Tank, the morning show producer, will walk 11.8 miles from their studio on St. Charles Ave. to the Armstrong International Airport, a trip according to Google Maps should only take 28 minutes. The walk will start at 6:30 and Tank will periodically call the station from a cell phone to provide updates.

Evacuating for Ivan was a chore, it took me and Jessica 5 hours to get to Franklinton but we left early. Same thing before Katrina, we left first thing Saturday morning after I drug my hungover butt out of bed and saw that red line right on top of the city. The trip to Franklinton was alright but that stretch between McComb to Shreveport was 12 hours thanks to what I consider a bad decision by the Natchez police to enforce traffic lights rather than keep the traffic moving.

Vydra, the station music director and morning show co-host had a similar experience. "It took me seven hours to make it to the airport," she said in a press release on their website.

The weather tomorrow shouldn't be too bad for Tank. According to Accuweather it'll be partly clody and the temperature should be around 89°F, but after humidity it'll feel like 100°F. If you see him out, be sure to give him subblock, and some water. At least he won't be out there too long . If he can keep up a 16 minute mile, he should be done in about 3.5 hours.

You can view Tank's planned route here.
More information can be found at the station website.

Bourbon Street... a place for families to bond?

2006-05-22T19:58:00.000-05:00

There’s something about turning 21 and spending your birthday partying in the French Quarter. Although I don’t think I’d ever get in a drinking contest with my mother and aunt on Bourbon Street, this scenario was the case a couple of weeks ago when the contest pit the ages against each other in a battle to see who would last longer.

I decided it would be better not to get involved when they started talking about trading tequila and Jägermeister shots.

And what have you been drinking young lady?

Monopoly

2006-05-06T19:18:00.000-05:00

Someone posted about a new edition of Monopoly in the Mardi Gras forum at nola.com. The developers have selected cities from around the country and opened up voting to select the sites for the properties. Each city gets three spots and from what I can tell the more votes a location receives the higher the property vales.

The Mardi Gras Post Part 1

2006-05-03T19:53:00.000-05:00

It's been a long time coming but I've been able to make some time to share a few pictures and experiences from Carnival. Overall, I think "Mardi Gras Lite," as Jon likes to call it, fits the description of this year's celebration, especially when factoring in the shortened parade schedule and smaller crowds.

Krewe du Vieux, a local favorite, kicked off the parade season. Jessica and I met Ray one of the Nola.com producers anlong with my old manager, Mike, and his wife from the day job. This was Mike's first taste of Carnival, and for those that have been to or in KDV would know they don't pull any punches in their satire. I have a very small, quick, and dirty gallery posted. I'll try and put a better one up later.

Our first BourboCam show of Carnival went off without many problems. Everyone was working longer shifts this year and sometimes we had shifts with only two people instead of three to cover everything. The individual shows have blurred together in these two months since Mardi Gras day but I'll try and hit the high points.

First off, I have to get this out, maybe a little preachy, maybe a little bitchy, bear with me. When we use "live and uncensored" to describe the webcast it's implies unedited and unprompted. If you watch expecting a boob-fest you'll be disappointed. There's also more men flashing as more would be women flashers are turning the tables on the guys. You may watch expecting the breasts of Bo Derek and end up with Bo Diddley. If you want tits that bad I'd recommend that you come down here with a camera or camcorder or just google them (NSFW).

Ok I'm done ranting.

First off, I had the pleasure of meeting Zach who had recently launched his website I Love Bourbon Street. He's been documenting his misadventures in New Orleans for a couple of years now and made it a point to drop by the show throughout the weekend.

The Saturday leading up to Fat Tuesday traditionally is a pretty wild time. With the depressed numbers of visitors in attendance and the threat of heavy rain in the greater New Orleans area the day shift made for a wet and sometimes lonely show. The rain we did see drove a fair amount of people off the street and into the clubs and bars. It was also one of the few times all the street preachers took cover. At one point the corner was deserted except me, Jon, and one preacher from the XXXchurch.

We had to give him props for braving the weather when everyone else scattered in the rain.

As the afternoon became evening more people would come out. and people were letting their hair down. Before you knew it Willard and Danika were there to take over and Saturday was over for me.

Sunday was my first time working with Danika in a while, since before the storm. We had seen each other last night but it's not quite the same actually working together. We were both scheduled to host without a production assistant so we spent the night trading off each hour sto make sure we could print email and monitor the stream. With the exception of the normal volume issues we were having a pretty good show.

Sunday was also the night things started to gel for me. I don't know if it was not really being able to ramp up and get into that rythm before Carnival season or the attitude of some of the email, but there was a different air out in the night. People seemed to have more fun and I was feeling it.

Monday I made it out early to get some pictures from around the quarter.

We met a pirate kitty:

Debbie the Bead Whore and I swapped jobs:

I learned I had a fan club:

And was even visited by my friend and dentist with his wife:
Finally for the ladies there was some beef:

We finished up early Tuesday morning and I had to high-tail it to my day job where I would experience sleep deprivation like never before.

Tonight!

2006-04-30T12:53:00.000-05:00

Still working on my final exams but we're doing BourboCam Live! tonight from 9pm to 1am. Don't forget Jazzfest Cam at Liuzza's By the Track today from 4-6pm.

From the Elections

2006-04-22T20:15:00.000-05:00

I'm at the Marriott inside the Secretary of State's Press Room with Nola.com covering the elections. The polls will be closing soon and announcements are being made to explain how the returns will be handled. It's an experience to see the behind the scenes of this as a media event. Local and national TV, AP reporters, and the TP & Nola staffers and contract workers all covering what is probably the most important election in New Orleans history.

The next press conference is at 8:30 and several of the TV stations have been reporting that none of the returns have come in yet. To the right of me CNN is getting ready for a report, placing a small step in front of the camera for their reporter, and what was a bunch of standing around drinking coffee and mindless chatter is turning into what you'd expect from a news event.

It's also at times like this I realize just how slow I type compared to many of the journalists here.

More later...

: CNN brought in Susan Roesgen.

: The crunch is over and it looks like it will come down to Ray vs. Mitch in the runoff next month. The furvor that was common between 8:45 and about 10:15 has died down. People are polishing stories and cutting segments. There's even one person playing Freecell.

: We're waiting on the absentee ballots. One of the election staff said we were about five minutes away from and announcement and info. Everyone who remained hurried to get ready for the results and waited.

Blogging Mardi Gras

2006-03-30T21:38:00.000-06:00

Looks like people are starting to get over their hangovers or the infamous MG Crud as more and more pictures and video are popping up.

Fabio Lite, who has recorded Mardi Gras since '97, posted 2006 pictures and video. For some reason I have an urge to remind everyone the Swiss beat the Canadians in ice hockey.

Bead Whore posted the first two of what may become many galleries to their website.

The guys and gals from MyDirty Sanchez have been working overtime to get their website going. Forums, pictures, and the boobies and t-shirt of the week.

The Penis Police posted their 2006 Mardi Gras pics a while back.

If you didn't already see the galleries at I Love Bourbon Street. I'd suggest you go and check it out.

Fellow Blogger Sherry has a plethora of images on her blog at Sherryland including visits to Tropical Isle and the Cat's Meow.

As always many of the regular fourmites at Nola.com will also post their pics on the Mardi Gras Forum.

If I missed anything make sure to let me know.

Edit: I knew I'd miss someone... Howard, who was the brainchild of The Treasure of the Nola Madre has posted his pictures.

Floodgate Cam

2006-03-30T17:04:00.000-06:00

WWL-TV is getting into the cam business with their Eye On Floodgates camera.

On the left side is Bucktown in Jefferson Parish and on the right is West End in Orleans. The big square empty lot was Coconut Beach Volleyball Complex. Missing are most the the structures that once dotted West End: The Dock and Jager's among others.

It's not the most exciting camera on the net, but then again what do you expect from the Army Corps of Engineers, Corps Gone Wild?

Taking Spring Break to Rebuild

2006-03-18T18:01:00.000-06:00

Nola.com kicked off the return of the weekly BourboCam Live! last night covering the two St. Patrick's Day parades in the French Quarter. Aside from missing part of one to stuff my face with a Gyro (completely forgetting that it was still Friday and lent mind you, but that's another blog post another time), we did talk to several groups of college students out enjoying their Friday night after a long week of gutting flooded houses in damaged areas like the 9th Ward and Slidell. For them the there was little question in how they wanted to spend spring break. They wanted to make their mark helping people whos homes remained largly untouched almost 7 months after the storm.

Unfortunately, I gathered no one really explained our roach situation. One student could not believe that roaches really could get that big untill they discovered the hordes dead ones in the walls of some of the houses they gutted. One of the other girls had her own encounter when a large roach landed on her back and tried to crawl down the front of her shirt.

Cue the freak out.

Homes weren't the only things on spring breakers lists. While waiting to pick up my gyro, I had the fortune of chatting with a second year law student out of, I think, Boston. She was in town with several other law students to look at and process cases of inmates being held for minor charges before the storm hit and were still jailed.

Back on BourboCam we met wave after wave of students from various states, with Minnesota, Illinois, and Wyoming seeming to stand out the most. I've also got reason to believe there were some Canadians in the mix. All of them happy to be helping out and happier to earn what became this morning's hangover.

Along with what Jon called, "College Students Gone Mild," we saw the return of another favorite subject on Bourbon St: Any convention having to do with sex. Last year I worked the swingers convention, this year I met those kooky girls of Slumber Parties here to thank their sellers, peddle their wares, demonstrate new gadgets, and well you get the idea. While the toys may not make it into Wired News columnist Regina Lynn's review of the hi-tech they did score points with Cat's Meow MC Big Mac (Mac may have scored points with them after a discussion of shoe size, he apparently has big feet.)

All and all the first night back left me with a pretty good feeling and I'm looking forward to my next show on March 31st.

Mardi Gras 2006

2006-03-01T20:52:00.000-06:00

My throat is a little scratchy and my sleep schedule is out of wack but I had a damn fun time.

Kudos to Debbie at www.beadwhore.com, Zach from www.ilovebourbonstreet.com and www.mydirtysanchez.com who hung out at the cam this year.

Full write-up and pictures once things get a bit back to normal.

I don't think a Harry Potter Convention Is In Town...

2006-02-21T19:04:00.000-06:00

Getting into the mood of Mardi Gras, I had a BourboCam stream open while working on homework (John Hick, "The Problem of Evil", from Philosophy of Religion riveting reading btw.) All of a sudden I hear these drums... it can't be the cats. I look up and outside Cat's Meow is this orange wizards hat with gold stars. Comming down the street, a crowd of orange and red dressed people. The whole deal lasted two minutes and I wasn't quick enough to get the 20second shots so here is the beginning and end as caught by our archive.

Edit: WWL, reported this morning that the Krewe Of Ancient Druids did a walking parade through the French Quarter last night.

It's Official, BourboCam Live Viewers Like Boobies!

2006-02-19T10:09:00.000-06:00

During the course of a live show we can get a lot of email. Next to those wishing us well and to keep up the good work (wish we really appreciate, if we didn't make it clear on the show) the biggest request we get is to see boobies. Now as a general rule, we don't solicit flashing (we have to keep some form of of journalism here), but Bourbon St. being what it is, and alcohol doing what it does, the occasional breast will fall out.

For your reading pleasure I present boobie email.

People who appreciate the boobies we do capture:

Ken from TX,

Love the mams...uh I mean cams.

Jeet from IL,

cool show guys...watching it from chicago where it is -13 with windchill....your show's keeping me warm..lets see some more titties....

From DINK the DRUMMER in KY,

I love all the FEMALE TIT shots...looks like a great party ...& I would like to be there! PARTY ON DUDE!!!

Denise from CA,

Ya'll are making me wanna FLASH over here!!!

Ron from PA,

hi there ron from new castle pa love the show doing a great job and we have alot of amish here love the boobs.

* Makes sense, they'd have to get their kicks somehow.

Mark & Ali in TX,

Great show guys! We feel like we're right there with you. We're having our own Naked Mardi Gras in the living room..

* Since it is Carnival, would they be at least wearing a mask?

Requests from people who missed them or want more:

Kimber in AR,

Hey guy's!! How's the party?!?!?!? my husband and I are snowed in ( in Arkansas ) We send shout outs to all of yall from us!!!tell the guys with the camera out front "Les Le Bon Ton Roulle" oh yeah let's see some titties!!

Tim in LA,

have a party at my house and thr guys want to see some tits.

Bill from VA,

How about some more flashers!!! It's cold here in Virginia Beach.

Billy in LA,

raceland la we wana see tittes

Rachel from CO:

Now, I bet you could get a lot of ladies to flash for those bible thumper beads...must be a rare item.

Hal from SC:

How about get some fine girlies to show their boobs to the people watching at home

Don from TN:

My sister and I are lying in bed with the lap top and we wanna see some tits. Both of us.

* Ok that's just strange... even by our standards.

And finally, Mike, Steph, Esch, And Ant in NJ write:

That guy in the glasses is a flamer....I love you guys anyway....GET SOME BOOBS ON THE SCREEN....BOOOOOOBBBBSSS!!!

* I guess sometimes you can't please everybody.

BourboCam NYE 2005

2006-02-10T23:37:00.000-06:00

I found a few pictures from NYE. This was the second event show and the first in front of Cat's since the storm.

Enjoy!

Jon Call Home

Brooke Visits from her temperory home in Alabama

Happy New Year

Looks Painful

Ready for 2006

Mail bag!

2006-02-02T17:19:00.000-06:00

McSwally from Soctland writes:

Hi, love the live spider which wanders across the webcam every now and then... whats her name?

btw had a great time in New Oleans and particularly in Cat's Meow on my 50th birthday @ Mardi Gras 2004.
Best wishes for post katrina revival from Scotland, UK.

While we don't have an official name, Jester suggested "Nosferachnid." Ray and I kind of like it.

Returning the Signs to Bourbon Street

2006-01-28T09:03:00.000-06:00

Back in October Chris Rose pondered the question:"Where the hell is Bourbon Street?" More specifically, what happened to the signs? Looted by looters? Snatched by a visiting military unit? Who knew but the fact of the matter remained: The signs were gone.

Fast-forward to last Saturday's street concert for Party Gras, an unofficial gathering of philanthropic Jimmy Buffet fans. I first spoke with Jennifer a.k.a "Cheer Dancer" who explained the philanthropy side of the Parrot Head organization and as a nearby parrot head noted, "had partied little too hard last night."

Jennifer continued, "We're all philanthropists. Each Parrothead organization has charities they support and also do charity work." Seeing this chance to help their favorite city the Parrotheds acted be doing what they do best: Holding their annual Carnival event and donating the funds to have the signs replaced.

I caught up with Jerry Diaz, the organizer of Party Gras who had also sent the email rallying the troops to help give back to the city: "A lot of (the signs) were gone; a lot of them had graffiti. That's what this is about. Order has been restored. That's not to say they won't end up with a bunch of stickers on the back."

Saturday's block party also included a dedication ceremony which included District C counsel woman, Jackie Clarckason. Before the dedication ceremony she added her thoughts on the return of the signs "It's fabulous! I had six events today but I'm here because it is so important... not only to Bourbon Street but the rest of the city. It tells the rest of the world: We're open for business."

And old joke...

2006-01-22T15:24:00.000-06:00

From the nola.com Bourbon St. forum, user sandandc writes:

coming to your wonderful city with my daughter, want to show our support, are there any safety issues we should be aware of??

"Beware pickpockets and loose women."

Party Time!

2005-10-24T20:39:00.000-05:00

It's about time! Article posted from NOLA.com below.

NOLA invites New Orleans to party
NEW ORLEANS (Monday, Oct. 24, 2005) -- NOLA.com announces its first annual NOLA FEST and invites the New Orleans community to a free two-day Halloween weekend party, with live bands, dancing, masking and more - all streaming live on the Internet to a world-wide audience. Two nights of local celebrity-filled revelry will celebrate the city's unquenchable cultural landscape as locals and tourists alike are invited to dress up for Halloween and show the world their support and love for New Orleans and its rebirth.
Kermit Ruffins and the Barbecue Swingers will be featured Friday night from 9-midnight at the iconic Fat Harry's on St. Charles Avenue in Uptown, as New Orleans residents and special guests celebrate their return to the city, live on NOLA.com. On Saturday, the party continues to the sounds of the Storyville Stompers, also from 9-midnight.
Fat Harry’s Bar, 4330 St. Charles Avenue near the intersection of St. Charles and Napoleon, is the site of NOLA.com’s live Paradecam webcasts during Mardi Gras.
"New Orleans has suffered greatly, and is still suffering," said Jon Donley, editor of NOLA.com. "But it's also a place where we live joyfully among the tombs of our families, and where the sounds of a funeral hymn are followed by a trumpet calling us to a second line that celebrates life. NOLA wants to share a time of music and celebration, and invite our community and visitors to mask, dance and show the world outside that we are still alive."
As masking is such a popular part of the New Orleans culture, those looking for an opportunity to costume during the Halloween weekend will find lots of others ready to do the same. Aside from the live webcast, NOLA.com will also be taking photos of costumed attendees and posting them in its popular photo galleries.
"Anyone and everyone is encouraged to attend NOLA FEST -- it is a party for the people that make this city so unique. It is a celebration of the return of nightlife back to the Crescent City and it should not be missed," said Cory Haik, managing producer of NOLA.com.

The Night The Signs Came Down In The Quarter

2005-10-16T08:55:00.000-05:00

Chris Rose, of the New Orleans Times-Picayune, did an article recently about the missing Bourbon Streeet signs. I noticed the two missing at Bourbon and St. Peter but didn't think anything of it. The problem compounds as Chris notes below:

Invisible boulevard

Judging by the street signs, Bourbon is nowhere to be found
Sunday, October 16, 2005
Chris Rose
Where the hell is Bourbon Street?
It's the question of the day down in the French Quarter as out-of-towners stumble about, blithely seeking out our Boulevard of Broken Dreams.
It is now a street with no name. From Canal to Esplanade, every Bourbon Street sign has not-so-mysteriously disappeared from its corner moorings, rendering unto one of the world's most famous avenues an eerily unfamiliar anonymity.
With the lone exception being the corner of Bourbon and Bienville, all the black Bourbon Street signs -- as iconic an element as this city has -- recently vanished overnight and now all manner of folk, from venturesome tourists to the masses of migrant workers, are wandering around asking each other: Where the hell is Bourbon Street?
It seems that the legion of karaoke, daiquiri and strip clubs, lined up like lascivious neon dominoes, would be an obvious indicator of New Orleans' alcoholic ground zero, but maybe that's only the case for jaded locals.
"I noticed that the sign on my corner was missing, but I just assumed it blew away in the hurricane," said Earl Bernhardt, owner of The Tropical Isle at Bourbon and Orleans.
But that is not the case. Because the support plates of most of the signs remain firmly intact, it's clear that most of them were methodically unscrewed from their mounts.
So what happened? Who made off with these primo souvenirs? Who stole our identity? Who looted the booty?
Sad to say, it appears that it was a commando team of either military or law enforcement personnel, making off with the spoils of war, like German Lugers and Nazi flags after World War II.
There was a witness to the crime. He works in a Bourbon Street bar. He wishes to remain anonymous:
"They were some kind of rescue cops," the witness said. "I couldn't ID them; it was the dead of night. But I saw them up there climbing the poles in their Leathermen jackets, taking down the signs. It pissed me off, but I wasn't going to go up to five heavily armed guards in some federal-looking Jeep in the middle of the night and raise a stink. But, guys -- why did you steal our signs? What's the deal with that?"
Indeed. And now, in garages, game rooms and dens across the American Heartland, Bourbon Street signs grace the walls of a bunch of guys who came to save our city.
On one hand you could say: Big deal. They came to our rescue; let them have their fun. And really, if you can't find Bourbon Street without a sign, you probably don't need another drink anyway.
For a more reverent counterpoint, we turn to City Councilwoman Jackie Clarkson, whose district includes the Quarter.
"This is not even funny," Clarkson said. "I can appreciate them wanting a souvenir after all they've done here, but tell 'em to go buy a pair of beads if they want something to remember us by. Whoever did this needs to be severely reprimanded. This has me very upset."
In addition to the sheer gall of the action, Clarkson points out the people who can't find Bourbon Street now include the legion of visiting safety personnel and first-responders who, if summoned to a crisis on Bourbon Street (like, say, some wobbly old retired schoolteacher menacing the cops), might not effectively find the scene in due haste.
Good point. Calls to the city's Public Works Department emergency line and sign shop both went unanswered Friday -- and will probably remain unanswered for a long time. So it's anyone's guess when the signs will be replaced.
For the final word on all of this, we turn to Brobson Lutz, the city's former health director, social gadfly and one of the few reliable post-Katrina French Quarter information brokers.
"If Bourbon Street were open for 24 hours, this never would have happened," Lutz opined. "See what happens when you have a curfew in the French Quarter? Crime goes up."
. . . . . . .
Columnist Chris Rose can be reached at chris.rose@timespicayune.com; or at (504) 352-2535 or (504) 826-3309.

A Fish Out of the Bowl

2005-09-25T16:01:00.000-05:00

I have some colorful friends. Keith Williams, a.k.a Fish, makes his way into a few of these posts and for good reason: He's a character. Normally he's well spoken and can speak intelligently on a variety of subjects, but when he gets talking about his boys the Saints anything goes. This is a sample of the obsessive Saints fan side of his personality.

Those motherfuckas!
You know, I realize we're under extreme circumstances but can't they win a fucking game!?
I don't care if the refs fucked us because they're such losers!
I'll be at Tiger Stadium.

Pornographic thoughts on the rebuilding of New Orleans (and other things).

2005-09-22T18:45:00.000-05:00

Ever since I started writing about Bourbon St. I've had the chance to read about and even write about some of the quirky stuff that happens in and around the French Quarter. Since I haven't been able to make my way back I've had to turn to what others are writing. For example, from the Diary of a Porn Pusher:

If the Bush administration is serious about spending $200 billion of our tax money in response to the flooding of New Orleans, perhaps it would be better to just give $1.6 million to each household there with the understanding that they will use their fortunes to start new lives on higher ground, somewhere else.

http://www.sexxxxpics.com/blog/archives/00001008.htm

At a McDonalds in Vicksburg, MS

2005-09-13T18:43:00.000-05:00

Sometimes Jessica Johanningmeier can go two months between visits to Franklinton to see her parents. Two weeks ago as Katrina was bearing down on the Louisiana/ Mississippi Gulf Coast was what she thought would be the last. Her parents, Luther and Joyce decided to ride out the storm at their farm. They were prepared for the worst, securing everything in sight and made sure they had enough supplies to get them through at least the next week without power.

They went two weeks before it was time to make a trip to bring them supplies. They were okay purchasing gas in the area as by the third or fourth day gass station lines evened out and returned to normal. The plan was to meet in Vicksburg, MS, bring an extra generator to help run their trailer and farm. Along with the generator, Jessica and her sister Leah, loaded up the car with food, some candy, and a twelve pack of Red Dog (as Washington Parish still has a moratorium on selling all alcoholic beverages).

Coming off the interstate we found the spot for the meeting a McDonalds behind the Wal-Mart. There was food, supplies, and gas all within the distance of a football field. Within a half-hour, the familiar green family van pulled up and out came the parents who were greeted by two very happy sisters. We had lunch discussing everything that happened up to now, not because we couldn't do this over the phone but simply because being there in person is a completely different experience. Even though they reported being okay Monday, it seemed there was a bit of doubt, those fears that they were understating their situation just so the kids wouldn't worry. Being there in person, seeing their smiling faces and that they hadn't lost weight quelled those fears.

With the exception of having to crack open two of the MREs and having no Ac, they've been pretty comfortable. The only horror story they had to report was by Luther. Last night he sat down to watch the LSU game. It's Friday night, the generator was humming along and the Tigers were trailing fourth down and 10 with a minute-twenty to go when LSU called a time out. Luther was on the edge of his seat when all of a sudden the 20 year old generator purchased for hurricane Elena started to sputter. As the game was returning the TV went dark. Sitting in the inky blackness Luther put his head in his hands, and without any other fuss went to bed.

All in all the reunion lasted for about an hour. Also, we did not come back empty handed. Usually with each trip to their house there are fresh picked mushrooms, okra, and even some eggs from their chickens. Today it was a box of MREs. Luther assures us MRE technology has come a far way since C-rations back in the day when he was in the military. I'll be looking for the Tobasco.

Helping his fellow man with nothing but a screwdriver and a radio

2005-09-12T17:44:00.000-05:00

Bob "Flash" Geiger is an IT professional with a passion for sailing. He like many others decided to stick out the storm basing his decision on historical data and a gamble that the storm would take the earlier turn and move east of New Orleans. Now an exile in Houston, he recounts his tale.

The day before the storm he spent time securing his house and making sure his boat had enough lines to keep it in his slip. "It was pathetic," Flash recalled, thinking of the lengths of rope used. Other tasks included moving vehicles, bagging important documents, and even putting his cell phone in a zip-lock... just in case.

The storm started and by 5:00am power was out. He went out at 9:00am amidst the rain to survey any preliminary damage. "It was after day break and I noticed the tree pulled down the lines," he continued, "usually the power company is pretty quick to restore power to my area. After seeing this I knew it would be a few days."

A few days still seemed like a reasonable assessment as water was creeping up the driveway "at the expected rate." Within 15 minutes things changed, and quickly watching the waters rise four feet in two minutes. Seconds later the front and back doors buckled and everything was moved into the attic.

Not wanting to spend the next few days in his attic, Flash pocketed his cell phone, marine radio, and a screwdriver before swimming next door to a two-story house currently vacant and being renovated. Before the day was out he would watch the water reach a couple inches short of his ceiling and realize that somewhere he lost his cell phone.

After the worst of the rain subsided, he accessed the roof over the first floor from a second floor bathroom. He noticed the choppers flying overhead and decided it was time to go. Over the radio on the Coast Guard channel he called for help. "What is your condition?" echoed back from the radio.

"Embarrassed."

He radioed back there were other people in the area and soon a boat arrived to start moving people out. "We worked pretty well, the hel'o would spot people, we would pick them up, and call back if anyone was injured and needed immediate evac." In one trip the 17' boat contained three rescue members and another 13 to be delivered to the Filmore Bridge. The original plan was to stage people at the bridge who would then be brought to the Superdome. The monkey wrench came when the New London Canal broke cutting off the escape route and forcing everyone there to spend the night under the stars.

He noticed very different attitudes of various people. "One woman," he recalled, "as we pulled up to her house she immediately started packing, while another was concerned there wouldn't be enough room for her fanny-pack."

With the exception of surprise from the door flowing in there was never a point when Flash remembered being scared he said, "It was more aggravation." He continued, "Panicking was never my style. People usually come to me when they are panicking."

When asked if he'd stay at the next storm, he replied on what would be done differently. "The night before I was going to bring my motorcycle to a multi-level parking garage," it had already started raining and he put it off because of the distance back. Another "should have known better" moment came while trying to pack his duffle bag in 4' floodwaters. In his boat there is a shipwreck bag for emergencies. By the time he packed his it was "a few minutes too late." It wasn't all too little too late for Flash. The best purchase he made was his maritime radio. "Most CG radios are not water proof," he added that this one not only survived the water but also ran for two and a half days on the same battery charge.

His boat actually fared better than his house. Wednesday, he visited Orleans Marina where 50% of the boat population suffered damage. "She popped some bow lines and the nose came down on the boat in the slip next to me... It was mostly scrapes and bruises."

Regarding the future of New Orleans, Flash is very optimistic. "There's going to be an incredible opportunity rebuilding New Orleans," he said with confidence, "I plan to be a part of that." The next couple of days will be spent in Houston replacing his Jeep and building his plan to aid in the reconstruction, all while fighting cabin fever. "I'm ready to go home, now."

Also posted to nola.com

Running from the Storm

2005-09-11T21:47:00.000-05:00

It is not just the Yats looking forward to a return to normalcy in New Orleans. John Storey, the PR and marketing director of the Crescent City Classic, shares this experience in Baton Rouge:

I went for a run along the levee in Baton Rouge yesterday, wearing my CCC T-Shirt and was stopped by three runners asking if we were going to be okay. So, while this is trying on everyone. Believe me, there are many many people counting on us picking up these pieces and "running" with them.

Other runners are finding their own ways to cope. Members of the New Orleans Hash House Harriers are also picking up the pieces. Hashing as a recreational activity thrives by members relocating and picking up in new cities. This helps bring this sub-culture into new cities or strengthens established Hashes. This process usually creates a churn of a couple people a quarter but was accelerated thanks to a visit by Katrina.

Within 24 hours of the storm the hashers began organizing their ranks through email and SMS then posting displaced hashers to the website. By Day 4 the first running of the Exile Hash was already set for Sunday September 4th in Baton Rouge. Longtime member Jim Uschold shares his Sunday experience:

The first running of the Exile Hash was attended by 20 or so mostly New Orleans and Baton Rouge hashers. We thank BR for providing such a lovely dry location to hash. The hash met at the Highland Park Archery Center where trail went through shiggy to the observatory, crossed Highland and went through the Frisbee Golf course to the beer stop. From there, it was through some neighborhood streets and on in.
The circle was notable for the attempted naming of the hash. Exile Hash was proposed. The favorite seemed to be Homeless Hash House Harriers (H4) but Houston is already H4. The matter was tabled.
No future hash has been scheduled. Hares are free to volunteer. BRH3 hashes once a month. We were thinking the Exile Hash could run once a month. Simple arithmetic would give us two hashs a month.

-Jeff

Quarter Vacation Part 3

2005-09-03T21:43:00.000-05:00

The following was written and slated for posting on Saturday August 27^th, 2005. With everything happening in New Orleans I wanted to make sure this was posted before it got lost in the shuffle.

Venturing out to Cafe Beignets for breakfast made us realize something very important: green with white striped awning and a name containing "beignets" does not mean they actually serve or make said doughnuts. Shame yes but the French toast was very tasty. Added to the fact they were next door to a police station made us feel very secure (and left me with the itch to go joyriding on a NOPD Vespa but I controlled myself until it passed).

Continuing on our Nola Madre inspired quest throughout the French Quarter, we passed Jackson Square and came upon a model, an assistant, and a photographer in a fountain. Well the model was modeling in the fountain, the photographer was photographing and the assistant was lighting. And to think we were expecting artists, psychics, and bums. We didn't stop to get any names but Jessica does wonder if dirty old men pose as photographers just to take pictures of semi naked girls in fountains. I started to look into a career change.

We found another few clues before heading back towards the hotel to check out. There was one false trail we found heading to lunch but fortunately it put us in the vicinity of Nacho Mamma's in the CBD so all was well with the world. We figured now would be as good of a time to head home, shower, and pet the kitty before the keg tapping party at Gordon Biersh.

I ate way too many jalapenos at Nacho Mamma's. Fortunately, there was a wide selection of beers at Gordon Biersh to make me forget about any abdominal discomfort. The beer du jour was the "Seasonal Ale" which was okay, nothing spectacular, kind of harsh. The Märzen, on the other hand, was tasty and went great with the BBQ sauce of the same name on the burgers.

We ventured one final trip to the quarter hoping to retrieve more clues to the puzzle. We found about four more and the location of a Lucky Dog vendor named Smitty. No dice. Smitty didn't remember squat about the clue. One letter that's it! We still had one more stop before heading back hopefully we wouldn't end it on a sour note. Strike two. We had a wrong location so no clue. Soon my stomach was doing jumping jacks and it was time to head home. Upon our arrival we broke out the rest of the puzzle pieces and worked on the final riddle with what we had. It wasn't making sense so we went back through our pictures and figured out the problem with two of our answers.

Then it hit us.

We figured out the location of the mailbox mentioned on the website.When I wrote this, we hadn't retrieved the final clue but that story will wait along with the details of the hunt. This trip did a few good things for us; it got me out of the house and away from the grind of work and school. Jessi was reminded of what she liked about the French Quarter. Not the frat boys, drunks, bums, and crowds but the history and architecture. It was a very good trip.

From the Red Cross Shelter at SLSU

2005-08-31T14:45:00.000-05:00

Information on establishing communications in New Orleans

2005-08-30T15:21:00.000-05:00

Amateur Radio Volunteers Involved in Katrina Recovery

Amateur Radio Volunteers Involved in Katrina Recovery (Aug 30, 2005) -- Amateur Radio Emergency Service (ARES) volunteers in Louisiana are engaged in the Hurricane Katrina recovery effort, and more are waiting in the wings to help as soon as they can enter storm-ravaged zones. Winds and flooding from the huge storm wreaked havoc in Louisiana, Mississippi and Alabama after Katrina came ashore early Monday, August 29. Louisiana ARES Section Emergency Coordinator Gary Stratton, K5GLS, told ARRL that some 250 ARES members have been working with the Red Cross and the state's Office of Homeland Security Emergency Preparedness. Much of the affected areas remain flooded and dangerous, however. As a result, state officials have not allowed emergency or other units to enter the flooded zones, and there is still no communication with many coastal areas.

Full Story: http://www.arrl.org/news/stories/2005/08/30/1/?nc=1

A Fish in the Bowl

2005-08-29T20:53:00.000-05:00

My girlfriend, Jessica, and I had been in Shreveport, LA the since midnight trying to contact various friends and family. I have one list of people who, while I'm very worried about their well being, I know that they know how to take care of themselves.

Not only was my buddy Keith Williams on that list... he was second only to my father. He, like my father, is currently the hardest to track down. Last time I saw him was during the beating given to the Saints by the Ravens but spoke to him briefly yesterday as he was moving his truck to a safe location. He wasn’t even thinking about leaving the city he loves.

With communication being what it is during a disaster one will need to be either lucky or a HAM Radio operator. Calls, IM, and SMS were being placed any way possible to make contact. Leave it to that S.O.B to let everyone know he's alive by getting on FOX News. That sly devil did it by making poignant commentary on the effects of the storm and the history of the city.

Edit (before I got a chance to send this up): Keith was also spotted in a bar where Fox News was interviewing. Everyone here gets the feeling he's become the official French Quarter tour guide to the news crew... Although, I think it'll be a while before we find out for sure.

Update from Shreveport, LA

2005-08-29T18:39:00.000-05:00

In shreveport. We stopped in Franklinton, LA to see Jessica's parents. I adopted a chicken. His name is A.C. in honor of my friend of the same name who owns the Chicken Shack.

Quarter Vacation Part 2

2005-08-26T09:50:00.000-05:00

Woke up and made it out the door for 8ish. Off to Café du Monde for beignets and people watching. Well, "people watching" was mostly watching a drunk sleep in his coffee. On the way out we ran into Copper Guy (Might be Bronze, I always get them confused) in Jackson Square. He was his usual ornery self as he made only a buck today. I'm trying to figure out what period of time he's working in as it was still pretty early on a Tuesday morning.

After a bit we started our quest for the Nola Madre. We went up and down the streets of the French Quarter finding one clue after another. So fat we have a lot of T & E. Personally, a little T & A would have been nice but none of the clues we were searching had us on Bourbon St. We ran into Bronze guy on Royal and found out his son, Gold Guy, will be back in town soon for the start of tourist season in the fall.

Before too long Jessica realized the dangers of her camera bag. At least how uncomfortable it is. We took a break inside the Shops at Canal Place and while Jessi rested her feet, I was checking out the sights. I know the Acadiana Parishes claim to have the best good looking girls but dayum... *bites palm*

Off to the Riverwalk next to forage for a quick lunch and more shade. All the shops there are such quaint establishments of local flavor: Brooks Brothers, Sharper Image, Victoria's Secret, and of course authentic New Orleans cuisine from the Panda King. (Sure we have a lot of room to talk but we were out of lunch plans after we discovered the restaurant where we had reservations was closed on Tuesdays... Boo on them.) Anyway a quick bite of lunch gave us the carbs needed to support the Daiquiris that came next. Off to the Fudgery we went for... well fudge. This was one of my favorite places to see as the shows are always lively, the people are friendly, and the fudge is mighty tasty. After we to the hotel for a little more Nola Madre research, a shower, and a nap before dinner and the night out.

I've never felt comfortable going to fancy restaurants. The type where two waiters wait on you hand and foot: pulling out your chair, and putting napkins in your lap. To be honest I can't usually afford to go to them. This New Orleans Restaurant month promotion was the perfect chance to. Jessica chose the location, I can't pronounce it. Most of the items on the main menu, I can't pronounce and couldn't afford anyhow. The special promotional menu had English entrees with garnishes and description containing more that I couldn't pronounce. (Yeah, I'm real cultured.) The good news is it was all very good. We even got special forks for the appetizers. Desert came, as did the special dessert spoons. Jessica ordered Crème Brule and if she could have she would have licked the bowl. Jessica would also like to point out that we had a choice between sparkling, spring, or tap water. The river levels made a wonderful vintage for 2005.

Shot mastery

2005-08-25T23:16:00.000-05:00

You have to hand it to the shot girl that can not only "get down" but also boogie while controlling her shot tray and not spilling a drop.

# sent from wireless handheld #

Quarter Vacation

2005-08-25T17:30:00.000-05:00

Over the next couple of posts I'll be recapping the trip to New Orleans I took with my girlfriend. Laqter we'll also include all the answers we found to the Treasure of the Nola Madre.

We checked into the swanky digs of our room at Loft 523. Two words to describe the room: white and minimalist. (Jessica points out that's actually three words... damn conjunctions.) Notable points include the dual shower heads and a light reminiscent of a giant boobie (therefore, it must be art).

On a normal vacation I wouldn't dare touch my laptop. This time is special as Jessica and I started working on solving the puzzle to find the Treasure of the Nola Madre. Unfortunately, while we lived in the greater New Orleans area all or most of our lives, neither of us are very good at history (...well local history. Jessica likes general history and I saw Ken Burns Jazz. My father on the other hand knows more than most but I digress). We did some research on a few items to search for in the morning so I'm not going to spoil anything for those also searching.

To space out arriving at the hotel and going to Bourbon Street, we made it to the Natchez Dinner Cruise. Jessica believes more restaurants need to take a cue in buffet management from the Natchez: Two lines of identical items each with dual serving pans of the popular items. Jessica noted the praline chicken did not resemble pralines in any way except the stray pecan that found its way into the recipe. She deducted the staff thought it wouldn't be popular, hence only having one pan per side. The bread pudding was the highlight for her. I skipped in favor of an Old Fashioned.

After dinner we went to the top deck for the Dukes of Dixieland Jazz band. Nobody was dancing so we took it upon ourselves to get some started. Good idea because it was a ton of fun; Bad idea because Jessica wasn't wearing the right shoes and received a couple of blisters for her dancing efforts. Either way it was fabulous.

Off to Monday night on Bourbon. I figured since on BourboCam we spend so much time outside the Cat's Meow, we should actually see what it looks like
from the front of the stage. It's a lot like the back except more neon. Dave was working like normal (by normal he was making sure my camera was full of cleavage shots of the fairer patrons... god bless him). He was taking everyone through the paces including Madonna, Elvis, and his own rendition of The Boss and Jessica Simpson (Jessica's note: Thank god he didn't put on Daisy Dukes... or that orange bikini.)

I'll be back later with the Tuesday recap. For now I'm heading to Utopia for Wolfgang's Homemade Bikini Contest.

I love my girlfriend... bites palm

2005-08-21T01:16:00.000-05:00

Actual conversation from tonights show after "quitting" to carry one cute girl who was looking for love off camera:

Well I have to get back before they really think I quit. You two are great, don't change a thing.
What time do you get off work?
Midnight. What's up?
We were wondering if you wanted to come home and make out with us.

IlovemygirlfriendIlovemygirlfriendIlovemygirlfriend
IlovemygirlfriendIlovemygirlfriend

2005 Red Dress Run

2005-08-13T11:43:00.000-05:00

This is BourboJeff. I’m at One-Eyed Jacks on Tolouse for the New Orleans Hash House Harriers 2005 Red Dress Run. With me is Steven Erwin, fearless lunatic and certified leader of the Hashers… or is that the other way around?

This is a thing [the hashers] have done every year, and they have been known for their crazy and wild events. Just how did the Red Dress Run come about?

In New Orleans [the hash] started out with eight or twelve of us, but the Red Dress Runs started in San Francisco. The hashers there did it, and they still have the largest one… about twelve-hundred people but you can go to the biggest or come to the best and that’s in New Orleans.

Is this the only event where you break out the red dresses?

Absolutely! We put on red dresses one time, about two weeks, to promote the event, but this is it. It’s got to be about the red dress, and it has to be in August.

This event always draws hashers from around the country and a few walk-ups who hear about the event through sources like nola.com and word of mouth. How many participants do you expect today?

Well the largest crowd is 300 but today I think it was more publicized so we may have a pretty big crowd… I can’t guess yet because the numbers aren’t available.

We’ll have to get those numbers later. Now it’s coming up on noon, and I’m in a freaking red sequined prom dress…

And no, it doesn’t make your butt look big… [laughs]

Well I was worried about that, but why August?

Well because it’s hot and there’s nothing else going on, so why not?

Separate the turkeys out, right?

Yeah yeah, you know there’s no tourists here, the restaurants are slow, the hotels are slow, and the hash is related to that.

The heat and beer causes some to get a little crazy. What’s the dumbest thing you witnessed someone do at the Red Dress Run?

The dumbest thing I’ve ever seen somebody at a red dress run was you putting that red dress on.

[laughs] Yeah, I’m going to have some chafing on my underarms after this…

The sequins, you know, you need some Vaseline on those sequins.

Thanks for the tip. thank you, Steven. More information about the Hash can be found on their website: www.neworleanshash.com

Links to photo galleries of the event:

Rain Delay

2005-08-06T23:45:00.000-05:00

One really well placed thunderstorm and a hole in the balcony can really ruin your night... more specifically your camera.

Cool thing was Bourbon Street bacame one big wet t-shirt contest for anyone who couldn't make it to cover in time.

Not cool: No camera to film it.

Good thing there's always next week.

Mail Call!

2005-08-06T10:31:00.000-05:00

Mike from OH writes:

My wife and I are coming to NOLA for the first time, in a couple weeks. What’s the first thing we should do?

Thanks for the email, Mike. We took your question to the streets and the most common answer from those surveyed was: Get Drunk. My esteemed co-host, Brooke, did recommend stopping by the hotel and dropping off the luggage and children first. Also, as everyone we talked to also happened to have a drink in their hands we think the results were a bit skewed.

- bourbojeff

Tales of the surreal

2005-07-31T14:02:00.000-05:00

I’m making my normal after-show trek down Bourbon to my car parked near Esplanade. Walking past Oz (which is north oft the ‘lavender line’ for you all playing the home game) there are two girls coming towards me. One of the girls was a blond wearing white hot pants and a white top that covered just enough to draw attention. They were both slender to the point that on first sight I thought they were transvestites with a really good tape job.

As we get closer the first girl walks past me and I make eye contact with the second in white. “So where are you going?”

“Home,” I replied. She looked a bit dismayed and asked if I was going home alone. “Yep, just got off work,” then with a huff and “Oh well” from her we continued on our separate ways. I took five steps and then it hit me: I think I was just propositioned by a prostitute.

Yeah, how often does that happen? I know it’s not like this doesn’t go on but it is one of those events that when it does happen to you and you’re left thinking, “WTF?”

While the girl didn’t get a chance to turn any tricks with me rest assured she’ll have plenty of chances to remain gainfully employed. There was that fraternity meeting in town. (And no Jon, I wasn’t going to go back and do any field research.)

- BourboJeff

"Go West Young Man"

2005-07-26T17:29:00.000-05:00

I’ve said it before: always bring a camera with you. What if instead of a camera you have a camera crew? Snoop Dogg would usually come to mind with to his Girls Gone Wild exploits, but the D-O-double-G will need to take a back seat to the following story:

15 year old Darius Weens spent the weekend in New Orleans with his own crew. He had embarked on a cross country trip with the help of 11 friends to document his first real trip away from his home state of Georgia. There is more to this trip than see the good old U-S of A as Darius suffers from a form of Muscular Dystrophy called Duchene, and confined him to a wheelchair for the last 4 years. The trip will not only raise awareness of the disease but also showcase the how far the nation has come with accessibility since the passing of the Americans with Disabilities Act 15 years ago.

I caught up with the caravan Saturday night as they may their way down Bourbon St. It was next to impossible to get to them ducking and weaving through the crowd that naturally follows someone with his type of celebrity status. I did finally catch up with a member of the crew to see what the commotion was all about and ask for a couple of words. Logan, the pack's ringleader, obliged and stopped everyone for a moment while I got Darius' thoughts of Bourbon St.

Let's just say he was having a great time and had a lot of beads.

The group's adventures, including the story of an extended stay in Lake Charles, are documented in their web blog.

-BourboJeff

(Also posted to the Bourbon St. Journal at nola.com)

Mardi Gras Indian Sightings

2005-07-24T17:41:00.000-05:00

[After that introduction, I was worried I'd start suffering from performance anxiety. It's a good thing that the French Quarter, and Bourbon St. in particular, provide ample topics.]

Yesterday was a normal Saturday night, which by Bourbon St. standards means anything is possible. Out of nowhere, crossing Bourbon at Orleans, were two masking Indian girls with pink feathery costumes leading a second line of people dressed in white. As police cleared the streets, pedestrians were mesmerized by the beat of music and their eyes fixed on the heavily feathered, sequined figures.

This was a real treat for everyone, since after Jazz Fest the Indians are pretty scarce. It seemed the biggest question was not "What’s going on?" or "Who are they?" but "How can they wear that in this heat?"

July in New Orleans can be described very simply: Nasty hot; even cotton sticks to you. I suspect it was a very special occasion for them to lead their group through the Quarter in this heat. The Indians, however, were taking it all in stride dancing to the brass band only a few yards behind. It seemed like they almost forgot the heat index was over 100. It was a good thing that each Indian had an assistant who kept them hydrated and offered the occasional brow wipe.

Making way through the chaos, I quickly snapped a couple of pictures from my trusty camera phone. The motion of the group and my own movement trying to stay ahead of them created a mass of pink and white on my phone's screen. Although the picture wasn’t perfect, it was nice to have even a blurry image to jog my memory.

Remember folks, wherever you go remember to bring a camera with you.

(Also posted to the Bourbon St. Journal at nola.com)

The interview started innocent enough…

2005-07-19T18:29:00.000-05:00

Actually, I should clarify: The interview startes as innocent as an interview can when I interview a bachelorette with a shirt full of gummy bears and I’ve got a dollar burning a hole in my pocket.

It looked like your normal themed harem of similarly dressed ladies ranging from girls to women. The bride-to-be adorned in a penis trimmed cow-boy hat, vial, and a gummy-bear shirt with the obligatory "suck for a buck" sign.

Traveling from Houston for a night in the Quarter, they were looking to cause trouble in any way they could, drinking, going to strip clubs, and doing other naughty things girls like to do when alcohol is mixed with the anonymity associated with visiting another city 347 miles away. The fact that it's New Orleans only multiplies that behavior.

Getting back to the hole in my pocket there I was face to face with both the maid of honor and the girl of the hour. "You can take your pick for a buck," the maid offered. Fortunately, I had a dollar left to take her up on the offer. After a bit of shirt rearranging by the party I found my target and quickly nipped one.

While I was down there I also ate a gummy bear.

There was a little more banter and then things got strange. The next moments are hazy as I think the gummy bear in question was laced with some type of drug. BeforeI knew it, the bride's mother decided I was good enough to eat, bit my neck, and started sucking. Hard.

When she finished there was a pretty good sized bruise near the base of my neck. They decided it was time to move on and I went back to the corner to survey the damage.

"There is going to be some explaining tonight," I thought looking at the purple and blue spot on my neck. Browsing the 72-hour archive I found exhibits A and B:

This experience taught me a very important lesson: Watch out for the older ones… they’re frisky.

"Drunks Beware Trip Hazard"

2005-07-17T13:37:00.000-05:00

New Orleans streets have never been known as a shining example of great maintenance. That’s why many of the local TV news stations have hotlines to report potholes and other road hazards that don’t include drunks falling in front of your car.

One much overlooked problem involves the sidewalks. Any drunk who knows enough to stay off the street and on the sidewalks aren’t safe from unexpected trips and falls. Heck we have a spot on the corner of Bourbon & St. Peter in front of Cat’s that I am notorious for tripping over while talking to visitors. Sober or drinking I seem to catch that one spot at least once a show.

Something had to be done! One resident has taken action to prevent unnecessary injury at their residence: a simple stencil and orange warning paint to mark the problem area. Heading to the show I noticed it down the block with plenty of time to get the camera out and ready before arriving to the area.

Remember kids, watch where you step… and look out for cars… don’t forget pick-pockets… and loose women… hell just stay inside and drink.

Saturday Recap

2005-06-26T00:27:00.000-05:00

During the course of my first year I've: had my microphone swallowed by a transvestite, been bitten by a bisexual vampire swinger, eaten Lifesavers off of a bachelorette with the boxers confiscated from god only knows where on my head, dressed up as a roman emperor with a gladiator fetish, had a whole bottle of glitter dumped on me, had a drunk fall on me and two very nice people from Canada, been propositioned by a girl who also invited Vampire and his wife to the party, dodged the mystery liquid from the balcony, seen more male body parts than anyone should in a given year, seen more female body parts than most people in a given year, been spanked, given a spanking, watched Catscan propose to his girlfriend and stop the show at Cat's, and now...

had my nails painted. Yep, I think I can retire now a fulfilled man... Nah!

On a more serious an note, (wow actual news!) the NAACP organized a march on Bourbon Street sparked by both the death of a black Razzoo's patron last year and a study citing discrimination at various Bourbon Street bars and nightclubs. The march started around 9:00am outside City Hall and was scheduled to conclude at Jackson Square. The plan published by the local news sources had the march working its way down Bourbon Street from Canal to St. Anne (the "lavender line" for all of you playing the home game).

Thanks to either laziness or procrastination I didn't make it out to the Quarter so instead I set up a window of BourboCam, then BeadCam, opened up the draft on the research paper I was working on for school and a blank word document to cover what was happening. Basically, I was going to give new meaning to what Jon refers to as "lazy journalism."

Three hours, four deliveries, a street cleaning, and a research paper later, not one activist graced our lens. The experience made me learn a couple of life lessons. If you want the story, go and get it. Procrastination will be the death of me. And last but not least: If you want to maximize exposure make sure to get every media outlet involved, including little fixed camera in the windows.

At least I finished my paper.

Articles covering the event:

More Coverage of Sheriff Lee vs. Rev. Watson - NOLA View Weblog @ Nola.com - Friday, July 1, 2005
Marchers Target Service In The Quarter - TP - Sunday, June 26, 2005
Minister Spurns Sheriff's Challenge - TP - Sunday, June 26, 2005
Nagain Targets Race Bias on Tourism - TP - Saturday, June 25, 2005
Sheriff Issues Challenge to New Orleans Minister - TP - Monday, June 20, 2005
Coverage on the Bourbon St. Journal Weblog by Jon Donley
[Reprint of TP Article] [4/15/05] [5/17/05 - 1 - 2 - 3]

We usually get our fair share of email during a show, but there is one that we get almost every week that asks for us to find girls who would bark like a dog. Why? Is this some exercise in passive domination? A anthropomorphic fetish? Boredom with the show?

I pose a challenge to those who want requests like this: please come down and find the girls who bark like dogs. The fresh air will do you good.

Don't get me wrong, we love the email keep sending them to us, pose questions, suggest fun things to discuss, tell us how much you adore the co-hosts of female persuasion. Just lay off on the dog barking emails. Thank you.

Little Things To Help You Live Longer

2005-06-25T12:32:00.000-05:00

I came across this article while looking up some fun for tonight's show. A 62-year old died at a funeral in the village of Brezovica. He was holding a metal cross when lightning struck him. He died in the hospital several hours later.

Let this be a lesson to Biker Jesus and the legions of groups descending on Bourbon during Mardi Gras and Southern Decadence: Don't make your cross out of metal!

New to Bourbon

2005-06-11T20:40:00.000-05:00

I don't think they got the memo...

Snake Coverage

2005-06-01T22:27:00.000-05:00

It was only a matter of time before Jon posted the video of a woman and her snake.

Midgets, Snake Taps, and Tinfoil Hats

2005-05-22T14:46:00.000-05:00

One group of people interviewed said they would pay to see a Cambodian Midget Wrestling Team.

Over the last couple of months there was a woman who would visit our corner and demonstrate the affinity between long objects and her throat by swallowing her pet snake. This action, much like the two puppies on display, would get mixed reactions from people. Some would complain about animal abuse. Others would pay $5.00 to see it again. I held my comment but gave her points for at least kissing the snake after she was done.

Forward to last night, she appeared outside The Cat's Meow sans snake. She informed me she had some bad news: her snake died having been poisoned by the makeup she wore. Apparently it was toxic and not suitable for consumption by reptiles.

A moment of silence was observed by the BourboCam crew for the snakes passing.

There are advantages to showcasing an unedited view of a night on Bourbon St. Tons of interesting people, drunk girls with gravity defying tops, and occasionally someone buys you a beer. It's not always that way though. Sometimes you have the interesting people who, while colorful, don't really produce a good interview. Jester's buddy, Biker Jesus, is one such person. He's definitely one of the more colorful people (and internet savvy) but he's no fun to talk to, even when you're not trying to mess with him. Last night we met a guy who believed sound and light would be subverted and used as weapons of mass destruction.

Fortunately, all my time outside of Cat's as built up an immunity to destructive sound waves. Now all I have to do is protect myself from orbital mind control lasers.

Well, some people need practical advice...

2005-05-21T22:51:00.000-05:00

"Welcome Visitors The French Quarter Is A Neighborhood Please Respect Our Neighborhood"
Translation: Don't piss on the buildings.

Jazzfest Coverage

2005-04-24T09:18:00.000-05:00

David Andrews, a regular Jazzfest visitor from New York, was featured by the Times Picayune. Of course, the first thing he does is call his family back home to tell them he's on BourboCam.

"Dirty... You're dirty!"

2005-04-17T11:10:00.000-05:00

I'd like to offer a little piece of advice to anyone who goes to Bourbon St. Looking for beads:

Look before you touch.

Treat those puppies like a downed power line until you identify what they've been swimming in.

I present to you a cautionary tale spun during a very nice spring night in the Quarter. Tax day had recently passed; there was a weekend break between the very successful French Quarter Festival and the popular Jazzfest, and a huge abundance of spring breakers, vacationers and others on vacation. In short there was a helluva lot of drinking going on.

Brooke and I were on break when a visitor decided to return his deposit of everything consumed throughout the evening right on the corner of Bourbon & St. Peter. When Ray, our producer, noticed our corner it merged with the previous dirt to become this brown sludge. We decided it was definitely something to avoid in the last hour of our show.

This brings us to life's first lesson: Know when to say when.

Getting back to the show, we worked stage left interviewing and having a good time with everyone. Eventually a group of revilers standing neat the fouled corner starts prompting the Cat's Balcony for beads. They got 'em and how. One particularly small set (by boobie showing standards) landed right in the muck. Following those beads down was the hand of a rather inebriated college age guy who wasn't going to let anything come between him and his prize.

I think you see where this is going...

This guy worked with lightning precision. He snatched his quarry before anyone else had the chance to grab him (or warn him otherwise) and proceeded to wear them around his neck. Ray watching the whole thing was transfixed; like watching a train wreck or "The Jerry Springer Show." The show wrapped up soon after leaving that image in our heads for the rest of the night.

So to anyone that will visit New Orleans I have to remind you of the real cost of getting those beads. It might be showing a little skin, giving a stranger a kiss, or even going where no one should ever go: the ground.

An Expanding Interview

2005-03-12T23:37:00.000-06:00

BourboCam Live host Sara chats with the owner of a local tatoo and piercing shop about expanding unnatural holes in one's head.

BBMM - Bourbon Brotherhood of Metal Men

2005-03-12T14:38:00.000-06:00

One of the first types of people I met working BourboCam Live were the statue men painted as a type of metal: Gold, Copper, Silver, etc. Personally, I'm waiting for someone to get creative with the Periodic Table of the Elementsand paint themselves Indium, but I digress.

At last night's show Jester and I noticed a couple of kids with a reenactment of Hamlet on the corner of Bourbon & St. Peter. Well word travels pretty quick when turf is being encroached and Bronze guy was out to make sure the corner was clear of unwanted vagrants. It was a shame, since I haven seen any Shakespeare in a while.

Of course, Copper Guy starts with the Pyrotechnics thanks to an aerosol can and blowtorch.

It turns out these guys have an gentleman's agreement between each other, run off anyone not in the agreement. It's sort of like a union but no dues. Yet it still doesn't stop young artists from attempting to make their mark (and a buck) on Bourbon.

To illustrate, within a half hour of Copper Guy moving on, this girl shows up with the sign "TIPS! Philanthropy is sexy." and proceeds to demonstrate her skill with balls. Specifically, one glass ball that she juggles along one hand like David Bowie in the movie Legend.

Who says art is dead?

Flash View -or- A View of a Flasher

2005-03-11T23:52:00.000-06:00

Crowds are a typical sight on Bourbon. Somewhere there is a theory being written that a girl motioning to lift her shirt changes the bend in the universe which causes more people to gravitate around her.

Karaoke and Lap Dances

2005-03-11T19:55:00.000-06:00

A soon to be newlywed demonstrates how she'll keep the fire alive after the wedding.

2005-02-27T07:55:00.000-06:00

At work on the corner of Bourbon & St. Peter

nola.com Coverage of The Krewe of Pontchartrain

2005-01-31T17:39:00.000-06:00

This Mardi Gras season I had my first stab at hosting the Parade Cam shows. Here is the complete video of the Krewe of Pontchartrain with ParadeCam host Emily.

Video: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Photo Gallery